Willpower eh? now what is that exactly..

Two weeks ago I talked about the opposite of willpower, which I called "other power"

Essentially I was looking for those things "outside ourselves" that could help in tackling problem habits which most of us don't want to continue in our day to day lives.

What is it we all mean when we talking about having "willpower"?

It's one of those funny things, we all have an idea of what willpower means to ourselves personally, but I was struggling to come up with a decent definition.

This being the internet I goggled willpower and let the democracy of internet search give me the definition (thanks Wikipedia - interestingly there isn't a page on willpower just links to other pages)

·  Self-discipline, training and control of oneself and one's conduct, usually for personal improvement

·  Self-control, the ability of a person to exert his/her will over the inhibitions of their body or self

So something about training the mind and the ability to exert control over your own body / self. This is really interesting because I often hear people talking about how they "have no willpower". We often don't think that willpower is something we can train - like a muscle - but surely it must change throughout our lives - so there must be a way for us to change it for the better - to be more focused on what we want.

The second part interesting part of willpower that is the idea of control. Surely the only thing that we have control over in our lives are our choices. But I find myself deciding to do one thing one day, but the following morning deciding that the exact opposite of what I want...

It's like there are many different "me's” all deciding different things at different times. Usually it's whatever is easiest or what will give me a little bit of comfort at that particular point.

Thinking about willpower in this way - is a bit more fun than thinking "I'm weak" or "I just can't do it" - but as a little argument within me, where different “me's” want different things.

The GetFit.com willpower training method

Based on this, the psychology team at getfit.com have developed a fun little training technique based on "self-talk". Self-talk is the way we talk to ourselves about what we are doing. But with this training method you are going to name the different "you's" that are talking when there is a situation that you feel Willpower is required.

We've all seen the cartoons with Donald Duck with an angel duck on one shoulder, and the devil duck on the other. I don't think that this is a helpful way of viewing the different "you’s" that you might appear when making a decision, but it gives you an idea of what I mean... Remember that both "you's" will be looking to make your life better, just going about it in different ways.

1. When a challenging situation arises - recognise it
- After all if you just react on instinct you won't be thinking at all

2. Stop and take some time to be aware of your thoughts and feelings
- This is where you can recognise the different "you's" who want different things

3. Give a little description to the different "you's" that are present
- This one is tired and wants a treat, this one is thinking about fitting into jeans.....

4. Act as a judge as to what type of "you" each would result in
- This first one will only look after my short term needs, this second one is thinking for the long term

5. Make a decision based on what you want to be in the future
- I'd rather be able to fit into jeans than have a treat just now

6. Just do it - no more thinking - you've made the decision, move on.
- Don't get caught up in guilt or brow-beating, you've made a decision - accept it and whatever goes along with it.

Remember that there is always some trial and error with learning anything new. Willpower is just you being clear with yourself about what you want and that there are some costs associated with getting what you want.

Of course willpower is not the entire picture, for the next few weeks we'll be tackling how to establish healthy habits - so willpower can take a back seat!.

Just can't shake this feeling.....

Wow - Hasn't everyone been sick recently?

At our offices, out with our friends and especially at home with family we've been noticing how there are a lot of sniffles, coughs and slightly panicked walks to the toilet.....

This got us thinking about, what if anything can we really do about it?

Most magazines have articles about the next wonder fruit / herbal supplement etc. to boost your immunity. While we're not going to say none of those articles have good information, at some point I guess we need to face reality and ask -

What can we do if we are sick? and how do we get well sooner?

Of course I think everyone got the message about hygiene a few years ago when H1N1 (Swine flu) reached epidemic levels both on the ground and on the media headlines. There was some great adverts which literally showed what a sneeze could spread... But while being aware of hygiene is important, particularly when dangerous infections are spreading, I think most people accept that they will catch the odd sniffle

But just to say that once you are sick you may as well just get on with it, might not be the best idea.... Surely if you have an infection, why put yourself in a place where you can catch another? Avoiding places that have a large numbers of people moving through it, or places where the ventilation is not great, means that avoid being exposed to any other "bugs" that are out there.

This is not always easy - you have a job, you have kids, you have responsibilities - but an awareness of this fact can help you reduce some of the non-essential tasks that might expose you to further illness.

There is no cure for the common cold. I guess we all know this but it doesn't stop us from dosing up on every vitamin and cold remedy we can get our hands on..... This is a sensitive point, because cold and flu remedies don't claim to make you better quicker. But it's a point that needs to be repeated once in a while. If taking medications that give you the impression that you are better, will reduce some of the other points in our list, then are they the best idea? I guess all that can be said here is that cold remedies are not cold cures..... so you need to take care of yourself in other ways as well.

Smoking, Alcohol, Reduced sleep and high fat foods can reduce your natural immune response. I guess these aren't revolutionary things to hear, but it links to the point above - if you don't feel sick, you can kid yourself that you're over that bug and just get on with life... or the old friend comfort eating raises their head and gives you the excuse to "get a treat" instead of what you might eat if you were thinking about your health. We or our friends have all taken a cold remedy before a night out on the lash... I guess the question is, how long do you want to have a cold for?..

We've been talking about the power of the mind a bit recently. The power of optimism to overcome infections is well documented. People who are more pessimistic tend to get more coughs /colds and take longer to fight them off. Incredibly enough - optimistic people have a bigger immune response to a virus or germ contact. While you can't just decide to be more optimistic, you know what they say knowledge is power - changing your outlook could help!

The main reason why coughs and colds go up during the winter is because of the weather. But not in the way you might think. Cold weather itself cannot cause a cold or "a bug". The best answer to why that we have heard is because cold weather encourages most people to stay indoors with other people, and then allows the injection to be spread around more. So ironically, not letting the weather dictate what you do, might improve your chances of catching something.... this really just goes back to the first point about avoiding situations where you are more likely to catch a cough or cold.....

Why is it so hard to do what's good for us?

It struck me this morning that if I did everything that I suggested to people when they ask for some advice, I'd be the healthiest person in the world! (I'm not, by the way)


But I'm not the unhealthiest person either. Thinking about this some more, I saw that it's never as simple as doing what you're told, or even doing what I know is good for me.
   I've realised that it's not even as simple as doing what I've already decided to do...


The shocking truth (and it is a shock to discover it again and again) is that with all the will in the world, I can't decide to be a healthier or happier person - I need something else to help me along the way.


This week, I thought we'd revisit some of the tried and tested methods that we use at getfit.com That don't include willpower - you might call this "other power" as they rely on things other than yourself.


The Bribe / The Bet / The Buddy

Creating some positive social pressure can make things more interesting.

For example I have a friend who bet a mate that he would lose 2 stone by his birthday - if he didn't, he would wear a tube top out on his birthday. Needless to say - he lost the weight. But there are less extreme examples that this....

The Bribe - is about getting something that you want - from someone who is supportive of your efforts

The Bet - is about the pain of defeat or the sweet taste of victory, a competitive friend /frenemy is ideal

The Buddy - just telling other people about your plans makes you 30% more likely to suceed - but only tell the people you could label a "cheer leader", keep it quite from those you might call "the nagger"


Bring some awareness to it - but don't react

So often it's easy to just react to the day....

The stressful situation at work kicks of the thought "here we go again.... they always do this"
That thought is not nice - you could say it feels like a hot poker - you've got to get rid of this feeling
Instinctively you reach for something that will distract you from that feeling - a biscuit, a cigarette,
sometimes you don't even have time to react and instead you just ignore that feeling and it festers.

By the end of the day (or the week) you feel horrible and end up using food, alcohol or something else as a coping mechanism to get you feeling "back to normal"
There is an alternative - it's not a quick fix, but it does get easier with practice....

When that event happens, take 3 minutes out of your day - stop.
Notice your breathing
Notice your body (your feet, legs, back, shoulders, arms, neck & head)
Notice how you feel (don't let your mind take over on this - stick with the feeling)
Notice what thoughts you are having (treat them as you would a cloud passing in the sky - there is no need to engage with your thought at this stage.

Holding all of your experience lightly, just tell yourself that it's ok, that this is my experience and I can feel it fully.

Take the last 1 minute just to stick with your breathing, however it is, and be aware of your entire experience.

Don't tell yourself what you must or mustn't do - just act as you feel you should with a new awareness of how you are feeling.

Both of these techniques are used through the GetFit Health Coach program.
Along with a personal health assessment and lifestyle analysis there are six programs to help tackle healthy eating, being more active, worrying, problems with sleep, low mood and stress management.